Single Hockey Mom

My son has been playing hockey for two and a half years now. For a large portion of that I've been living the life of the single hockey mom. While all hockey parents understand most of the work that goes into having your child play hockey, experiencing it as a single parent is just a bit different.

I thought I would let the world in on some of the unique situations you find yourself in. And throw in some of my humble advice.

1. All money is counted in ice time and equipment.

Okay, unless you're extremely wealthy and even then, this sport is expensive. What is spent alone on
blade sharpening, stick tape and sock tape in a season of rec league hockey, could probably get you a whole season of Little League baseball or probably two seasons of AYSO soccer. 

If your child is in love with the sport and wants to play as much as possible (which they are because why on earth would choose this sport otherwise), you are taking them to extra clinics and even getting private lessons.

So, every time you are about to spend money, your mind thinks, that's a clinic, that's a skate lesson, that's a new helmet. And finally it thinks, no I don't really need new underwear (As if you had time for anyone one to see those anyway).

You go without all the time and people think you're crazy but really you're getting so much in return. Watching your child smile after only an hour before, he was crying about missing his dad, well you can't put a price on that.

2. Your pride goes out the window

You can't do everything yourself. The job is too big and costly. You'll borrow, you'll except charity and ask for help to the point of chills of guilt running down your spine, and your stomach churning from all of the pride you just swallowed. But, you'll do it, because it's not about you. It's not about what others think of you. It's about your little boy doing what he was meant to be doing.

It's about those times that you're stressing about asking for more help while your son shoots on his net in the garage. And he comes running in saying "Mom, come watch! I can go top shelf now!!"

3. Hot hockey coaches

You will be surrounded by eye candy, which sounds great in theory, but it's not. You are single and everyone knows that. So even though there will be married women that fawn and flirt, no one will care or suspect anything is going on, even if it is! 

Now there you are, constantly in contact with these young attractive men, that your kids love, but you have to be careful with how you act because rumors will spread like wildfire!! 

So a word of advice to new single hockey moms. When married women start drooling over that one coach's perfect rear end, don't join in! Unless you want people to think you're trading "favors" with that coach. 

4. Married Dad's

While there are many sweet and devoted married men around the rink, that are genuinely friendly, you still have to be careful. There will be those dad's that, something about you being single makes them forget that they are not. You have to play dumb quite a bit to avoid conflict. You're often left to wonder why these men don't foresee the atomic bomb of hate that would drop if you did not handle these situations gracefully. But you learn quick because no one wants to see that explosion.

...

I could probably go on but I feel the above are the biggest points that set apart the single hockey mom from the rest.

In regards to the different treatment I have to believe it is because there are not many single hockey moms, so we become exotic to everyone. Some are intrigued, some fear us, but there will be those few parents and coaches that are not prejudice and are true friends. So if you are a part of the rare breed called Single Hockey Mom, stick with those people that have shown you true compassion, they are your soul mates!!

It takes a different kind of child to play hockey, a different kind of person to be a hockey coach, a different kind of person to be a hockey parent, and an even more unique woman to be a single hockey mom. 

But I salute all those that dedicate themselves to the great sport of hockey! 

Go Ducks!!! 

JYM